Guide to understand surreal Belgica and misterious soul of it's inhibitants.

Guide to understand surreal Belgica and the mysterious soul of it's inhabitants.

translated 

chapter from "Earth 

- the platet of naked 

apes" 

by Zeul the Alien.vol 12 943.

As observing the third planet of Solar-system at night, you can wonder about a "spider net" of the bright lights in a Middle of North-West-European part of Eurasia. Yes, they illuminate the road tracks,as part of the "practical ways" to use the electric power of the nuclear plants, as humans didn't find yet the way to accumulate electric power at hours ,when demand is lower.

This is Belgium - the home land of some 10,666,866 humans (2008) and territory about 30,355 km² (that number will significantly diminish after the "Grate flood") 

"Young couple"(1830 A.C) of two Frank tribes,marryed after defeat of Napoleon, differ only by Latinization of "Mother Wallonia"(as it happened between" two brothers" -French and Germans after separation many years before) constantly quarrying about the money (taxes)and misunderstanding of the verbs.Previosly poorer,but now proud,hardworking "Father Flanders",doesn't want to pay "child support" for many adopted "Mother's Wallonia" "Unfit children", even dispite her outstanding beauty (Arden mountains,forests and rivers ) 

She used to be bit "bitchy" to Flanders (in it's relatevely poor past),she used to push her "mother tong" in inapropriate places, but she was defiantly supportive during her "Congo-Rubber-Bongo" Golden Age.

Obviosly "Grandpa Brussels DC", who used to speak Flemish and lives at "Flemish house" ,but forced to wear "French cloth" by Leopold the Second, will open it's channels and the river and restore his rights,"regain it's soul", but he will not let the couple to divorce,

as he knows, that Wallonia soon will reopen her "mining treasures", provide home for escaping from the " Great Flood" refugees on her hills 

and language problems will be solved by "The Common Human Language Communication Act".(sipmlified English)

"Foster children" will be politely forced to "Integrate" - accept 350 Belgian beers (and actually start drinking it), their women will be politely asked not to remind about "being special" fashion speaking,at least at the public places. 

( although "Belly dance" will be finally accepted under strong supervision from anti-terrorist groups) and all should be forbidden to "call names" and misbehave against this tolerant Father and Mother,who provided welfare,warm shelter and food for them.

Maybe they also will be asked(regardless religion fate and sexual orientation) to work for a common good of the Nation, from witch they carry a social security number and a driver "license to kill". 

Any carbon based life forms should visit Belgian restaurants, ( French sometimes still remember how to do it, but...) and also spend at least around 250 Earth years among this mysterious people, who appreciate beer and wine equally

.To be continued...

Situation of the country

The "peaceful anarchism" of Brussels architecture may well be the feature that best characterizes Belgium as a whole. During its history of over 2000 years, the region has almost continuously been occupied by foreign powers: from the Romans to the Spanish, the Austrians, the French, the Dutch and the Germans. This has made the Belgians critical of any form of authority, and laws, rules and regulations are not taken very seriously (tax evasion is one of the national sports). This individualistic, anti-authoritarian attitude is perhaps best exemplified by the famous literary figure of Thyl Uilenspiegel, who mocked the Spanish authorities during the 16th century occupation.

The governing of the country is very much complicated by the particular structure with three language communities (Flanders in the North, Wallonia in the South, and a tiny German speaking region in the East), and the multilingual, multicultural and multinational status of Brussels. The language in Wallonia is French (although there still exists a not officially recognized "Walloon language"). The language in Flanders is Flemish, which is officially the same language as the Dutch which is spoken in Holland. In practice, the differences between Flemish and Dutch (mostly pronunciation, also vocabulary and expressions) are comparable to the differences between British and American English, and are just big enough so that Dutch TV sometimes add subtitles to Flemish spoken movies. Although Brussels is surrounded by Flemish territory, the majority there speaks French. Flanders comprises about 55% of the 10 million of Belgian inhabitants, Brussels 10 % and Wallonia the remaining 35%.

There have been a lot of political conflicts between the two main linguistic communities, but the language problem, which is the issue that has received most publicity outside Belgium, is (at least in my view) much less important than it seems. Since the federalization of the state the linguistic conflicts seem to have very much diminished, now that politicians are no longer capable to blame difficulties on the "other side". There have never been any real conflicts between Belgian (Walloon and Flemish) people, as opposed to conflicts between Belgian politicians. The best illustration of that is that even during the most heated episodes, no one has ever been killed or seriously injured in clashes connected with the linguistic conflict. It suffices to consider similar situations in other countries where conflicts exist between cultural or linguistic communities (e.g. Yugoslavia, Canada, Northern Ireland) to conclude that such peacefulness is not the common rule.

Belgium has, since the Middle Ages, always been one of the richest and most developed regions in the world. Just look at the historic churches, town halls, and pieces of art, in cities such as Brussels, Ghent, Bruges, and Antwerp to get an idea of the wealth during the mediaeval and Renaissance periods, when only the North of Italy could rival its splendour and artistic development. During its second golden age, the half century before World War I, Belgium was in absolute terms the fourth economic power in the world. If you take into account that the other industrial powers had a 5 to 10 times larger population, the achievement is impressive. This wealth was not due to natural resources, which are practically absent, but to industrial production and trade, which is facilitated by Belgium's central position in Western Europe, and the presence of many land and waterways.

Although it is fashionable in some quarters to view Belgium as an "artificial state", put together by the European powers after Napoleon's defeat, history shows that the region which is now called Belgium has been almost continuously under a single rule since at least the 16th century, when it got separated from Holland during the reformation. Before that period (and for a few years after the defeat of Napoleon), Belgium and the Netherlands were united, forming the "Low Countries", a remainder of the third, central part of the Frankish empire, Lotharingia, that formed a corridor between France and Germany. There has historically never been a clear split between the Walloon and Flemish provinces. Insofar that there was a division in counties and duchies (Flanders, Brabant, Liège/Limburg, ...), the divide was East-West rather than North-South as it is now. (this is clearly seen on a set of historical maps of the wider German region). The "Flemish" painters and polyphonists who were famous throughout Europe in the Middle Ages and Renaissance often were of Walloon origin (for example the painter Rogier Van der Weyden/Rogier de la Pasture and the composer Josquin des Prés).